Poor Unfortunate Souls (For my Requestee)

LYRICS BY HOWARD ASHMAN
MUSIC BY ALAN MENKEN

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I ad-mit that in the past I’ve been a nas-ty.

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They were-n’t kid-ding when they called me

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well, a witch

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But you’ll find that now-a-days

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I’ve men-ded all my ways

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Re-pen-ted, seen the light, and made a switch,

(SPOKEN) True? Yes.

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And I for-tu-nate-ly know a lit-tle of mag-ic.

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It’s a tal-ent that I al-ways have pos-sessed.

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And here late-ly please don’t laugh

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I use it on be-half

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of the mis-er-a-ble lone-ly and de-pressed

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pa-thet-ic,

(CHORUS)

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Poor Un-for-tu-nate Souls,

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In pain in need.

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This one long-ing to be thin-ner

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That one wants to get the girl.

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And do I help them? Yes in-deed.

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Those Poor Un-for-tu-nate Souls,

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So sad so true.

VERSE 2

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They come flock-ing to my caul-dron

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Cry-ing “Spells, Ur-su-la, please!”

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And I help them? Yes, I do.

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Now it’s hap-pened once or twice,

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Some-one could-n’t pay the price,

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And I’m a-fraid I had to rake ’em

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Cross the coals.

(SPOKEN)
Yes, I’ve had the odd com-plaint.

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But on the whole I’ve been a saint,

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To those Poor Un-for-tu-nate Souls.

(SPOKEN)
You’ll have your looks.
Your pretty face.
And don’t underestimate the importance of body
language! Hah!

VERSE 3

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The men up there don’t like a lot of blab-ber.

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They think a girl who gos-sips is a bore.

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Yes, on land it’s much pre-fered

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for la-dies not to say a word.

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And af-ter all dear what is i-dle prat-tle for?

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Come on! They’re not all that

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im-pressed with con-ver-sa-tion.

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True gen-tle-men a-void it when they can.

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But they dote and swoon and fawn

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On a la-dy who’s with-drawn.

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It’s she who holds her tongue who gets her man.

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Come on you poor un-for-tu-nate soul!

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Go a-head! Make your choice.

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I’m a ver-y bus-y wom-an

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and I have-n’t got all day.

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It won’t cost much, just your voice.

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You poor un-for-tu-nate soul.

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Its sad, but true.

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If you want to cross a bridge, my sweet

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you’ve got to pay the toll

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Take a gulp and take a breath

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and go a-head and sign the scroll

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(Flot-sam Jet-sam, now I’ve got her boys,

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the boss is on a roll!)

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This poor un-for-tu-nate soul!